Bio after adopting...

I shared this on FB a couple of weeks ago but wanted to share it here too.

Having a bio baby after adopting...it's beautiful and yet heartbreaking at the same time. As I watch this precious little angel grow, I grieve for the moments my other girls missed. When Bria is sleepy and fussing, she nuzzles her little head into me and rubs her hands on my face. She closes her eyes and instantly calms. She knows she is safe in her momma's arms, her chunky thighs evidence of the nourishment she receives. I breathe her in and thank the Lord for the gift she is.

Today, I'm especially thinking about what Beilyn missed, the love and nurturing her little brain and heart missed, how it affects the way her brain is wired now. Bria is just days away from turning 6 months. She's the same age our Beilyn was when she traveled to a hospital 10 hours away to undergo open heart surgery. Alone. She had already gone through abandonment and living months in an institution. Then she spent 27 days recovering in the hospital from major surgery alone. 27 days without a momma to snuggle her or rub her tiny head or whisper reassurances in her ears. It was devastating to hear my child endured that but to imagine Bria going through that now makes it even more real. That time is lost, but I'm thankful we have forever to show Beilyn how very loved and adored she is.

Beilyn, 7 months old, taken just a few days after she returned to the orphanage after her surgery.